Intimacy and its Importance in Relationships

Today’s blog is by CFSSC Clinician, Lisa Pelletier

The topic of intimacy comes up a lot in couples counselling. Many couples often describe intimacy with their partners as being “lost” over time. Intimacy is defined as “a close, familiar, and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person or group”. 

Intimacy in relationships

In long-term relationships, couples often find they let intimacy slide or take it for granted. It is important to prioritize intimacy and work to keep it as part of a healthy relationship. Work, social and family commitments can get in the way and, in time, couples can feel lonely and disengaged in their relationships. However, by taking a few minutes out of your day and actively trying to add intimacy back in your relationship, you can begin to reconnect with your partner. Here are some tips to bring intimacy back into your relationship.

Tips for intimacy in your relationship

  • Take the time to look at and smile at your partner.
  • Kiss at least twice a day, including kissing good morning and good night.
  • Become pillow talkers – regularly chat in bed before you go to sleep, after sexual activity and when you wake in the morning.
  • Put away your iPads and cellphones when you get home, face time is more important than screen time.
  • Spend the evening talking, listening to music, playing cards and games, watching some television, exercising and having sexual intimacy.
  • Humans are storytellers. Pay attention to positive, funny and lively experiences in the world and share them with your partner.
  • Being playful from time to time is healthy, mature and fun.
  • Sleep naked and skinny dip in the summer.
  • Intimacy includes a loving, kind relationship with yourself. We are all unique and wonderful just as we are today.

Have you noticed you and your partner’s level of intimacy is not what it once was?

Visit our Couples Counselling page to find out how we can help.

About Lisa

Lisa Pelletier (MSc RP, RMFT, BESTCO) is a registered Psychotherapist with over 30 years of clinical experience. She holds Masters degrees in Science and Marriage & Family Therapy. She is a member of the clinical staff at CFSSC and specializes in Marriage & Family Therapy and Human Sexuality.